So I’ve got this thing in one part of my life where someone’s holding on to something that they don’t want but doesn’t want anyone else to have. So person is making life miserable for all involved and frankly, it pissed me off as I’m an affected party. Not only does it piss me off, but it hurts. It hurts me, the other people in the equation and quite frankly, it causes a cluster because:
- No one can make good decisions when you’re holding on to something for dear life
- The decision to hold on isn’t necessarily about WANTING whatever it is. It’s about fear.
- Fear is a nasty little effer and decision made based on it are…poop.
See that? It came full circle.
We all do it – there’s no shame in The Cling. It’s human nature, really. We’re inherently afraid of change so we grab the status quo by the nads whether it’s what we want or not…simply because it’s familiar. I’ve been there in relationships, in business…hell, I’ve even been there in Target. I buy the same damn thing because it’s habit, not because it’s the best or what I really want. My brain shuts off and ritual kicks in, and – lo, and behold! A cart full of crap that I don’t want or need, but it’s coming home with me because it was on sale, on an end cap or in the package I recognized.
Here’s your bitch slap: let go. Clingy no workie. When you hold on so tight to this cart we push through life’s store, you don’t give yourself the freedom to snoop around in the organic veggies. We’re so used to going to the bagged salads that we don’t give ourselves the freedom to grab some fresh Hearts of Romaine and see what a handmade salad tastes like. Stop latching on to the familiar. It’s not really comfortable at all. It hinders progress, stymies exploration and offers absolutely no fertilizer for anything new to grow in our lives.
I’ve found that, in my own life, when I start to shed those things that no longer serve me, I make room for a ton of growth. New relationships, new friends, new clients and opportunities…they make themselves evident when you open your eyes to them. I tend to live by a Dorothee Solle quote:
If my hands are fully occupied in holding on to something, I can neither give nor receive.
Ain’t that the truth? How are we supposed to grab onto the new opportunities in life if our hands are busy holding onto other shit?
Look at your life and your business today: what can you release so you can welcome new things?
And to the person still holding on that’s affecting those I love, let go. Move on. Stop being angry. You don’t want what you’re holding onto…you just don’t want anyone else to have it because you’re mad. White-knuckling life is no way to travel, eh?
You’ve been slapped.