If Only…

So, here I sit at the dawn of 2008, having been conspicuously absent from my blog for well over a month. To run-down the latest, here’s the Update on Erika:

  • Climbed on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day (wearing a Santa hat, no less!)
  • Spent New Year’s in Denver
  • Have attempted to date (success still TBD)
  • Went ice climbing in Colorado
  • Fell into a freezing river
  • Went cross-country skiing for the first time (FUN!)
  • Launched a non-profit organization
  • Still raising a puppy (say hi, Hippo!!!)
  • Freelance writing business is going gangbusters

SO! All in all, a dandy start to what could have otherwise been a lackluster year.

As I’ve determined that 2008 will bring me fortunes untold, love of a lifetime, and opportunities unprecedented, I’d like to broach – here, in the first installment of Redheaded Fury for 2008 – the “if only’s.”

Now, this stems from a conversation with Melanie (as some of my best blogs have!), where she said something to the effect of, “If he were normal, we could have a great relationship.”

Isn’t that always the case? It’s the pervasive (and invasive) If Only.

Now, If Only is also related to the Oulda Sisters: Shoulda, Coulda, and Woulda.

I think the three of them are bitches. And If Only is right up there with ’em. Downright bastard, I say.

If I spend time worrying about what I Shoulda, Coulda, or Woulda done, I’m not really paying attention to what I can do, now am I? If I spend my time focused on how Mr. Wrong could have been Mr. Right instead of accepting the fact that he turned out to be Mr. Right Then, I think it’s possible that energies are misfocused. All I’m saying is if your start something by wishing that someone were something other than exactly who they are, it sure does create a shit storm that’s brewing disappointment on the horizon.

This is my year to abandon the 4 n’er-do-wells above and send them off on an adventure to the land of Fuckitall. I’ll let someone else bother with them, as I simply don’t have the time (see list above).

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