A Short, Ass-Kicking Note-to-Self

note to self redheadwritingHey Erika – yeah, it’s Erika. No, not in some fucked-up Black Swan sense, but as in I Am In UR Head sense. Grab your coffee. Let’s chat.

Last night I caught you wanting to quit something. You pulled a pouty-pouty-pants routine and started with the exhausting “I suck. Fuck this” routine. Pretty.

So this morning, I’m sending you a quick note-to-self that it’s bullshit and it needs to stop.

Do you really think that anyone who is successful just wakes up one day and BAM! success? Get off the merry go round and come back to Planet Earth, because they don’t. They work at it. There are no handouts, no hall passes. There is no such thing as luck and nobody rides a golden unicorn off into the sunset holding a pile of Olympic medals. So where do you get off wanting to quit just because something was hard?

I’m going to give you a day or two to pull your head out of your ass and start practicing what you preach, else there is going to be a colossal smack-down. You’ve gone back to looking at life in terms of years instead of decades and somehow figured that self-deprecation is productive.

So I’m calling bullshit on you and hope you figure a few things out, because it’s pretty hard to be any kind of productive with your head so far up your ass. I’m going to go do fun things and you can sit there all day and do whatever. You know where to find me – I’ll be out enjoying life and smelling the beautiful California air while you have shit stuck up your nose from your head-in-ass maneuver.

Enjoy, kid. Hopefully, I’ll see you soon.

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45 comments
The Redhead
The Redhead

I'm just delighted that you found it useful. Thanks for stopping by today.

Nick Rapson
Nick Rapson

I have just penned myself a similar note!

Brenda
Brenda

This is the most hilarious (and TRUTHFUL) things I have ever read. I didn't read all of it, though, because my vision was impaired with my own head-in-ass maneuver.

Ms. Snark
Ms. Snark

I am so full of my own bullshit, I wouldn't know where to start kicking my own ass. Strangely it's both reassuring and un-motivating that you can do it for me. Forgive my crybaby mood.

Ms. Snark
Ms. Snark

There are times I am this hard on myself, it sucks.. so I use it as an excuse to slack. Viscous cycle.

Matt Given
Matt Given

Yo Red - Since this post seems to have inspired an inspirational quote feeding frenzy, I'll pile on: I used to be OCD about Ironman triathlon training and the dude that invented the ironman once said, "You can always quit. But you should understand that nobody else will care and you will always know." ouch.... Then, I also like my own little saying for myself during the ironman marathon, "Pick it up Alice...." Enjoy

davinabrewer
davinabrewer

Wow, you bitch slapped yourself. Would that I had the smarts, the energy, the cajones. Since you like other peoples' quotes, one of my favorite movie lines .. Tom Hanks as Jimmie Dugan on baseball: "It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great." FWIW.

Jamiek8
Jamiek8

Nice spanking. Good on ya. My Grandpa always said, "It's a great life if ya don't weaken." Too true. Hope you enjoy your day as much as I'm enjoying mine. xxoo

Shelly
Shelly

Offering you a virtual crowbar to help with the head removal from the ass. I am not offering the padded one, as it seems you don't need the easy way out.. ;)

Angela
Angela

So this is just a little too freaky!! I'd swear you'd gotten inside my head the past few days and intended to kick MY ass instead of yours....and believe me, mine needed some kicking. So thank you!! Just what I needed. :-)

Cherry Woodburn
Cherry Woodburn

Thanks for ass-kicking. I changed Erika to Cherry, and read because am in a slump myself.

The Redhead
The Redhead

Giving up is certainly easy. But as someone below said, ya gotta live with it forever. I'll skip quitting. This time. And on this thing :)

TiffanyEckhardt
TiffanyEckhardt

Sorry you had such a bad morning... but glad you shared. I like MegCarpen's idea of printing this off and posting it by my desk. I was having one of these types of moments right before I read your blog. It was the bitch slap I needed!!!!! Thanks

Martha G. Chavez
Martha G. Chavez

Erika, you're my hero. This is just what I needed to hear today. Guess I'll have to cancel that pity party. :) Thanks!

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Can I marry you? ;-) I love introspective posts. It's a sign we're not afraid to admit that sometimes we're full of shit, and that in the grand scheme of things, my blog writing block, or beer belly, or receding hairline isn't too bad compared to a hungry kid, or an abused wife, or a homeless person trying to stay alive in winter. Thanks for the reminder, miss. :)

The Redhead
The Redhead

Glad to provide the entertainment at my own expense ;)

John Falchetto
John Falchetto

Right on the money Erika. You are lucky to have such a nice little 'voice' which calls Bullshit when she sees it. Most struggle with the other little voice which is always there and ready to say 'poor you, its really really hard, you gave it your best, quit now.' Quitting is easy, its living with it for ever which is a killer.

marclimon
marclimon

I seriously wish more people were this hard on themselves. When I hear the "Golden Rule" - treat others as you would like to be treated - I always laugh. I'm a drink some water, change your socks, shake the sand out, drink some water and get over it kind of guy. I don't think others really want to be treated that way I treat myself. Thanks for the LOLs and inspiration. marclimon

Tabitha Edwards
Tabitha Edwards

Thank you for sharing this! I can insert my name since I've been in this pitiful mood myself.

MegCarpen
MegCarpen

I'm tempted to print this out and stick it above my desk. I'm not in one of those moods now, but I won't deny that they happen. And it's always helpful to have someone remind me to pull my head out.

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