There’s where we’ll begin this Monday morning.
We’re raised to be polite, to compliment people and offer congratulations on a job well-done. We’re told to say please and thank you, respect our elders and never look a gift horse in the mouth.
When are we taught to be insulting towards people being kind to us?
I’m completely exhausted with people who, when offered congratulations, offer a quick thanks and then proceed to pick themselves apart with self-deprecating remarks. Here’s the rub: it’s insulting. It’s insulting to me and everyone else who takes the time out of their day to offer you recognition for your achievements.
A quick conversation on Twitter yesterday brought me someone who was raised to equate accepting a compliment as arrogant.
Accepting a compliment isn’t arrogant. To believe you don’t deserve one IS. You’re not above thanks or the ability to bask in a moment earned. You’re not above respecting the person standing in front of you, at the other end of an email or writing a blog comment. It takes only a moment to say thank you.
There doesn’t have to be a qualifier following. It goes like this:
Person A: “Hey! That rocked – congrats!”
Person B: “Thank so much. I appreciate it.”
So this Monday, enough with the self-deprecating bullshit, OK? If someone tells you congratulations, smile. Accept it. Say thank you. Respect the person who’s taken their time to help you celebrate a victory no matter how big or small that victory might seem to you. When you have a victory, remind yourself that there are thousands of people out in the world who would kill for a single triumph.
So embrace your triumph. And maybe your triumph is learning how to accept a compliment. It’s taken me years, but each day, I get better. My next goal is to get better at sharing my triumphs and helping others have more. Self-deprecation is insulting – to you, to those who care about you and even those who don’t know you from Adam or Eve but take the time to recognize what you’ve accomplished.
Quit being a dick. Leave self-deprecation to the stand-up comedians. You’ve been slapped.